Staying Calm in Stressful Situations
Staying Calm
in
Stressful Situations
by
Lizzie Turner
Feeling overwhelmed and stressed is a universal experience. As we come to the end of a third lockdown, going back to school or work may have been extra overwhelming.
This week I returned to college for the first time in 9 weeks. It has been both a tiring and stressful week, to say the least. Returning was so nerve-wracking. The whole situation was uncomfortable for me, from seeing hundreds of people I didn’t know to sitting in lessons worried I might get asked a question with the whole class looking at me.
‘Everybody has different ways of coping and you should feel proud of yourself when achieving something you thought you couldn’t do.’
I found exam season last year a great time to understand how I could cope better. The biggest trick I learnt was separating myself from people who say negative or anxious things. I often compounded my own negativity. I would say things to myself like “I am not going to remember anything – I hate this!” At the time, it feels like a coping mechanism, but it really isn’t. It’s just making it worse.
So I find being around people who are projecting their stressed or negative feelings just before an important exam is simply not a good idea. Instead, I created my own system over the exam period to make sure I don’t become too stressed. Otherwise, I knew it would affect my work in the exam.
Tip 1: Breathe...
I find my own space where I can focus on breathing. Focusing on your breathing can aid you significantly. Just simple deep breaths in and out can calm you down. The best thing about this is that no one knows you’re doing it so there is absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about!
Tip 2: Positivity
Try to think positively. I know this is much easier said than done! If I am struggling, I will try to reassure myself that this isn’t the first exam I have done and more often than not, the outcome is never as awful as I thought. Focusing on the times you have proved yourself wrong is rewarding. It will also help with reducing your stress.
Tip 3: Chocolate!!!
I like to have a small lindt chocolate ball before going into the exam hall. They say chocolate is supposedly good for your brain (https://universityhealthnews.com/daily/memory/2-chocolate-benefits-for-your-brain-improves-memory-and-mood/) Either way, at least you can enjoy a little something before entering the hall to sit your exam. It doesn’t have to be chocolate. It can be anything that helps you feel like you are treating yourself. This will hopefully reduce nerves just before the exam.
Sometimes these tactics don’t work. And that’s okay! For me it is about not letting that one particularly crazy, pressured experience shape my next experience. We can learn from any experience, even the difficult ones!
The message I am trying to get across is that when feeling stressed or overwhelmed, in any setting, it is really important to address these feelings and take time to spot them. Trying to manage them at the same time as the exam itself can make you feel worse. Everybody has different ways of coping and you should feel proud of yourself when achieving something you thought you couldn’t do.
Finally, the truth is that at some point, everyone has felt the way you are feeling – even if it doesn’t look like it! I reassure myself by reminding myself that when returning to college everybody will have some sort of uneasy feeling about being back – it’s challenging for them as well!
A note from Dyslexia Matters’ Director Liz Blackburn
Reading Lizzie’s blog made me remember reading ‘The Chimp Paradox’ a few years ago. For those of you who are not familiar with the book, according to Steve Peters we all have a ‘Chimp’ and a ‘Human’ side to us. Our Chimp looks out for danger and overreacts emotionally, whereas our Human is rational and has perspective.
Lizzie shows an impressive ability to keep her irrational emotional ‘Chimp’ under control even in times of stress, by focusing on breathing, positivity and chocolate, thus allowing her calm ‘Human’ side to shine through and cope, enabling her to do her best. Anything that helps us, and especially learners with dyslexia, to gain perspective can only be a good thing.
Do please share Lizzie’s blog with those around you – her techniques may not work for everyone, but they could be a springboard for discussions about potentially successful strategies in future.
Lizzie is 17 years old and is currently studying for her AS Levels. She has dyslexia. Owing to Lizzie’s fantastic outlook on life, she always manages to find the positives from all the challenges that living with dyslexia can throw at her! Each month Lizzie shares a short musing with us to help us understand those challenges and to hopefully help people realise they are not alone finding certain parts of life more difficult.
